My last blog

need not ever see the light of day again. I don't really know how to delete it off this "blogger", so I've emptied it and I think it's just settled below this one quietly. I kind of don't know what I wanna talk about tonight, but I felt an irresistible urge to do a little writing/sharing. When I say sharing I kind of don't know who even reads this or if anyone does, so I'll take an educated guess that a few people have a browse if they notice it. Either way I don't really care because it makes me feel better.

Right this minute I am sitting watching YouTube videos. Not those ridiculously funny ones you see on rudetube. But just some live music ones, recently I've been finding it difficult to listen to certain artists because of the emotions they evoke within me. But now I really don't care and I can listen to this and strum along freely. Just for all your entertainment, I'll post what I'm listening to this second on here, controversial to say the least. My favourite Smiths tune - well the one the video starts with.

I've also been sketching out a new tattoo I want. So many different designs have just been hidden away - I want somebody to give me like £5000 and tell me to go ahead and get all of the tattoos I want. I really think it's quite funny when people say things like "Why are you getting tattoos so young, you'll regret them when you're older". To be honest I don't really care if I look down at my body when I'm 40 and think "WTF". My tattoo's mean something to me right now, and everything I want to have means something to me. It don't even think tattoos have to mean something for a person to get them, some of the artwork I've seen on people is incredible, yet they try and justify it with a half-hearted reason. At the end of the day it doesn't really matter what anybody else thinks, we're all going to die naked eventually, so you may as well get a few pictures on your body. I don't think I've ever really explained what the quote on my forearm means to me, well not fully to anyone. It's hard too as well, because I don't think somebody would understand or get the explanation without knowing a shed-load of other background information to go with it. For those of you who don't know, I have the words "Albion is our Vessel, Arcadia is our Destination" along the lower region of my arm. I got this from a book called "The Books of Albion". They're basically a collection of scribbles, pictures and dairy entries so to speak from Pete Doherty. The full quote goes something like this... You'll probably guess why I didn't want it all. 

"Albion is our vessel, Arcadia is our destination, and our starting point. One needn't have a classical education or a British passport; only imagination. Let it be what your heart desires, but let not your actions or desires infringe upon the liberty of others."

It goes a bit deeper with a bigger explanation on Arcadia - It's not the Greek translation that refers to utopia, it's more of his own grasp on the whole concept of a life with complete understanding and harmony. The reference to Albion within the quote is in idealistic vision of England spoken about by many other famous writers. Musically speaking Morrissey was one of those. I don't really know much about the writers that inspired Libertines like Pete to venture into Albion - but the idea's are definitely appealing to say the least. I started reading a book by Peter Ackroyd about Albion, but I put it down half way through to play Call of Duty or something I guess. Anyway I've rambled on about tattoos and one of my own for a bit, so below is a picture of the concept which my next piece is going to be about...

I'm guessing some people will get it from that, really don't want to explain it but it's just a piece based around one of the bits of that. The bit that starts, "not shy of a spark". I think I might try and go to sleep soon, I've developed some mild form of insomnia I think. I used to always wake up the next day and see people were last online on everything at like 4am and think, fuck, how do they manage to go to school and stuff. now I realise it does get hard to sleep sometimes. It's really quite horrible, considering nobody else is really around.

Peace out world x

Long time no blog.

I realise that title isn't catchy what so ever, but I don't mind - that's not what I'm here for. There isn't a reason why I'm here actually, I was just lying in bed last night and I just felt like writing a little bit. I was at my dads house so I didn't have my books or anything lying around. So here it goes...

It's hard to say how I've been feeling recently. It changes daily. Mostly I feel like I have the weight of the whole world on my shoulders, when realistically I have a tiny amount of responsibility and like everyone my age I have a huge amount of opportunities available to me. A lot of people don't seem to realise that, or they just choose to ignore it and follow what other people are doing or what other people say they should. A few of my friends share the opinion with me that actually, doing your A levels and going to university isn't the only option. Don't get my wrong I think that is probably the most sensible choice if you're academic, but it's not the only one. From experience I think that whole route is just too stressful and time consuming for a Libertine like myself. (I joke, I'm clearly not a Libertine, although I wish I was). Back to the point, the people I know who are no longer on that route so to speak, are far happier and relaxed, and actually seem to know what they want to do. Rather than just  following a path set out for them by Connexions or something stupid like that.
I'm pretty sure I know what I want to do now, it's just choosing between a couple of little options a long the way. I'm currently on an apprenticeship training/studying to be an IT technician. Not exciting by any means, but achievable. I finish around September time and potentially have a steady job available to me, but I've been realising that maybe this isn't as glamorous as I'd hoped. If you know me then you'd know I've always wanted to go into the forces, and gaining these qualifications and this experience can help me follow a route into the RAF to some rather tasty positions. That is definitely more enticing than anything I've ever considered before.

Lets change the subject anyway... MUSIC.
I haven't changed my musical preferences recently, just added a few different artists to the lists of people I can enjoy listening to whenever. The main few probably being Ed Sheeran (no Indie jokes please Bean), Red Hot Chilli Peppers, The Cure and Jimi Hendrix. Quite clearly most of those are artists that have been around for a lot longer than I have, and I had heard of them before now, I've just been listening to them on repeat a lot. Last week at some point as well, I went playlist crazy. I made one and now I just can't stop. It all started with a cheeky little one called "Acoustic Chill Out". This was compiled from my iPod and just contains about 80 random songs I can song a long to when relaxing (mainly in the bath). The other night I made a fair few, there were such classics as;

• Trino' Tunes
• Smashing It Playlist
• The V Man Special
• Hype Hype Playlist
• Duty Grime Time
• Sing-a-long

I think all of the above are self explanatory, apart from the V Man Special, that's just basically some metal tunes rammed into a playlist that I can leave on shuffle and headbang to. I do this whilst smoking a fag out my window and watching passers by look at me puzzled as to why they can hear really loud shouty noises coming from a house in Stonydelph. In all serious though, they do exist, this wasn't some sort of joke to get a few laughs. It's not funny anyway so shut up Bean.

What else have I been up to recently, I hear you scream? Well, I've been playing the Gears of War 3 multiplayer Beta a hell of a lot. It's amazing though, and for all of you GoW fans, I urge you to somehow play it in the next couple of weeks before it disappears. It's just like a finely polished ball bag. A ball bag in the sense that it's not like ordinary genitalia, it's got some depth to it. It's a game different to Call of Duty (which lets face it, every shooter now gets compared to), it's so much more fun. It's completely team orientated, there are hilarious little executions and additions from the last Gears. One they've released on the Beta is that you can Frag Tag chickens that are running around one of the maps. You can also shoot them or melee them, which leads to a random cloud of blood and feathers splatted on your television screen.

I feel like I've said enough now anyway, but before I go I just want to give a little shout out to a couple of local music artists. They aren't necessarily every bodies cup of tea because they do grime. But I know on the sly everybody likes a good 16 bar. Here's a link to one of their Twitter's. Below is a YouTube video that amazed me by one of them. To think a few years a go the Grime coming from Tamworth was nothing but average, this is a complete other level. Personally, I'm looking forward to supporting their progress and hoping they turn out big!

Pretty Girls Make Graves.

Upon the sand, upon the bay, there is a quick and easy way you say?
Before you illustrate, I'd rather state.
I'm not the man you think I am.
End of the pier, end of the bay, You tug my arm, and say.
"Give in to lust, give up to lust, oh heaven knows we'll soon be dust."
Oh, I'm not the man you think I am.

        I don't think any compliment of any form, be it in song or just spoken word, can really justify what Steven Patrick Morrissey has done for music. I personally can't really put into words how I feel about his music, it's just too hard. Every song evokes a different emotion until the point of me aimlessly sitting listening to the lyrics rather than doing what I was previously. I don't know why I'm trying to put it into words actually, it doesn't really need any. If you listen to The Smiths you'll know what I mean, if you don't then so be it, but you're missing out. I say you are missing out as if it's something that's currently happening, but no, I think I would give up a lot of my life just to witness The Smiths playing. The closest I get is my dad talking about how amazing they were at Glastonbury and at this place and this place bla bla bla. 
        Anyway it's the V festival announcements tonight at 11:00, or so I've heard. I've already got me ticket along with a few friends so either way I'm going. I hope there are atleast a few bands I've been itching to see. If I don't want to see any of them then I will still go because I know it will be an incredible weekend again. The chances are though that there will be a great number of the acts I'll love - I think I'm hoping that Beady Eye play more than anyone, but I doubt it. You never know.
         Doesn't arrogance make your blood boil? I hate being told that I'm arrogant or that somebody thinks I am. Because I am not. There isn't a need for it in the world - how can anybody think they have the right to be better than someone else. I understand being better than somebody at sport or having generally higher intelligence, but surely there is nothing that allows you to feel like you are above somebody else. Especailly, when you come from a similar background, you come from the same small town, your friends are friends with their friends e.t.c. I don't like to rant but recently people have taken me to a degree of annoyance that I do not regularly visit. Everybody is the same realisticly, it doesn't matter how you put it. You bodies contain the same organs and run the same way, so stop thinking you're better than everyone else or you'll get a massive SLAP on your left cheek from JMEbbk. Not the real JME anyway, just his Twitter account. (He's my buddy you see)
        Writing this has sent me from a state of ecstacy, to being in a poor mood. One of those where every little thing annoys you and makes your face screw up. So I'm going to call it a day. I'll leave you with a video from youtube that I enjoy listening to when I'm down - it helps me realise there are nice things in the world for your ears (not just earmuffs - is that one word? not sure).

  

It's quite funny really

how I can be so happy and so sad at the same time. I guess it's a little easier for my mind to combine both of the emotions rather than take the strain either one of them provides in mass. Also, I think I'm only feeling the happiness/love at the minute because I'm listening to Noah and The Whale and the climax of Blue Skies just played. It's strange how music can make you feel happy if you're upset or down when you're up. I wish I could make music that would cheer people up, I wish I could make music that would make people feel sad as well actually. I think I do make music that pisses people off though - mainly when I'm sitting around drunkenly strumming my guitar. When I'm alone and nobody else is around, it sounds awesome though. See now another song has come on (Modern Man - Arcade Fire) and I feel all chilled out and relaxed, maybe a bit tired. Which will probably slow down the progress of this writing, and I won't finish it for ages. Unless some Oasis comes on or some Professor Green gets me motivated. Not literally him, just his music - although if he's offering I wouldn't mind a little 1-to-1 motivational speech from him.

Anyway in a previous blog I mentioned how I was going to the Safari Park! Well tomorrow (Wednesday 23rd Feb) is the big day, it's also my Dad's birthday. I have foolishly accepted a challenge within which I have to take a picture of myself with every animal I can find or legally get near. I probably won't do it, although I'm certain I will. It depends how distracted I am by animals that are fornicating. This week hasn't been too bad altogether so far. My friends are off from school so there are more people around to chat to or play xbox with. My nan is making good progress in her recovery too, god bless her. Thursday night is definitely going to be Lionel Messi though. Involving a heavy pre-drinks sessions with various spirits and lagers. Followed by a few cheeky pints and cocktails then a skaaaaaaaaaank in Trinoooo. That's my excitement out the way for a couple of days. Can somebody tell me why the event on a Thursday night there is always called Misbehaviour? I never get there and see people copying out of text books rather than working out the answers, and I never see anybody on their phones under the tables rather than writing out their lines in a C5 detention. It's not a bad name however, I just don't see much misbehaving going on. What else am I doing this week you ask? Well I want to go into Birmingham or somewhere better for a spot of shopping, but nobody else seems to want to at the minute so I'll probably wait around for a few weeks or so. That's about it guys.

I have had a MASSIVE craving recently, I really want to just play with Lego. Just create a random house or building, (Pyramids were my speciality when I was younger). I could sit and play with Lego for hours now if somebody gave me some! I think I could build something similar to the one in the picture to my right if I had the right equipment (and maybe the instructions). I sound like a really boring person don't I, shame. This craving came from watching Ed Sheeran making a Lego house on Ustream when somebody gave him it as a birthday present. I wasn't just sitting watching by the way, somebody sent me the link and informed me if he gets to 100 viewers he was going to play a new song of his. So I decided to join the gang and I wished him happy birthday too, considering it was his day of birth and all. Fair play to him though, he actually replied and chatted to a lot of the people on there, which is more than can be said for some of the music artists who use it. The main reason for that though is probably because he isn't really that famous (no offense intended), I just mean there aren't 1000s of fans dying for him just to say hey to them, or tell them he likes their display picture portraying some sweaty cleavage. One day though Ed, one day.

I've been on a Liam Gallagher craze again recently, I watched a video he was in the other day and he said something along the lines of "wearing a Parka is fucking top, you put it on and walk down the road and you feel like you're going to fucking war or something". I loved that sentence so much I sat back and listened to him saying it about 30 times. But he does have a point, any lad who has a big coat (not neccesarily a Parka) knows the feeling. He also told the story of his first Parka - a yellow Yves Saint Lauren wonder that his nan stole from the back of a shop she used to work in. I wish that was my story more than anything.

Beady Eye seem to be quite a controversial upcoming band at the minute as well, but considering the band contains Liam Gallagher there is bound to be a massive amount of hate and love from it either way. I personally think they're good, people need to shy away from the obvious assumption that he's trying to recreate Oasis because there isn't any chance of that. The music only bloody sounds the same because it's the exact same vocals. Not sure on his new hair cut though, I say new, it looks as if he's just had it chemically straightened and he spruces it up a bit when he's around in public. Still the old long top sideboards look. That's all I have to say for myself for now kids. Bye.

This blog has no title.

The lack of title to this blog has nothing to do with the way I'm feeling or anything. It's just I can't be bothered thinking of a decent title, by the end of the blog I will have probably thought of a fitting one though, making this paragraph irrelevant and mysterious. ooooooooooo. At this very moment I'm sitting down on my xbox, with the FIFA Arena screen on my TV and one of those really annoying songs playing through my Turtle Beach. I went to the gym this morning so I'm a little tired now and can't be bothered doing much. I'm talking to Milkerz as well (Luke Jordan), over the xbox, and he's making funny pictures of himself for some reason - here's one he made earlier.

Speaking of xbox, I have 2 points to raise. The first being my current form on FIFA. For some reason I've gone randomly terrible at defending, I know most of you don't care about this - but it's quite embarrassing when people are thrashing you left right and centre and you're supposed to be a boss man when it comes to sports. My second point is basically to tell you all how much I'm looking forward to Gears of War 3. Every time I see Tim Vaughan it reminds me of Gears, seeing him at the gym this morning and combining it with my murmured straining grunt that sounds remarkably like Marcus Phenix taking a sniper shot to the chest got me thinking... Will it be as good as we are all hoping or will it just be another Gears of War flop. Saying that though, I never really played Gears 1 that much so I'm not quite sure how much worse Gears 2 was, but i definitely enjoyed it loads. The storyline looks good and the new weaponry and the array of new evil characters looks decent. Anyway, that's enough of the geeky stuff hehehe.

LOOKING FORWARD TO GOING TO THE SAFARI PARK!
Yeah, I'm going to West Midlands Safari park early next week in the school's half term. I'm going with my girlfriend, one of her friends, one of mine. Like a double date without the date, just 4 friends in a car looking at wild animals and hoping to get their faces licked. I might make use of this digital camera I've got and take a few pictures. Hoping to catch a nice one of a giraffe or something with it's massive tongue on a certain someones face. I haven't been there since I was little, and I have fantastic memories of the place so I hope it doesn't disappoint. I remember going there and not really enjoying driving through the animal enclosures, but I loved going on all the animal themed rides. I hope there's still that ride where you are on a worm and you go through an apple. I'm guessing I'm way too big for it now BUT I DON'T CARE LA LA LA.

Looking forward to a lot of things as well, I've got my holiday to Zante with the boys approaching quickly. But probably more importantly to my life, I am starting an IT apprenticeship in March for those of you who don't know already. The only bad thing about this is that I can't have much time off and it means I can only go to one festival in August because I can't afford to have all that time off. I've decided I'm going to V Fest again though because I enjoyed it loads last year, and the rumoured headliners sound wicked. (Arctic Monkeys and Eminem with Rhianna). It probably won't be them but I know I'll have an awesome time anyway.
I don't have that much to say to you all recently anyway, people are changing, mostly not for the best. Most of my mates are staying steady though just the way I like it. Remember people, BE YOURSELF, not who somebody wants you to be.

Live Forever, LG

Had a proper look today at Liam Gallagher's brand (Pretty Green), as in IT the other day I watched a video of an interview with him about it. The clothes themselves are decent looking for the mod-style, but I can't really say they're anything special. I mean, they're "top", but if I was going to spend £240 on a Parka, I'd much rather go Ted Baker or Paul Smith. I considered heavily the prospect of purchasing quite a few things today, but I went for a lovely pair of shoes and a little Hollister number, a brand most respected for it's muscle-fitting qualities. Not trying to say I'm hench to that degree, but their clothes are extremely flattering.

I ended up buying the shoes displayed to the left anyway. I like boots, but I couldn't find a pair that I liked that much. The type I refer to as "JLS boots" I'm not too keen on, but they suit most people. I only thought I'd show these on here because I love them, and they cost me a fair wack - so enjoy them. (I wish I could get the background of that picture to black, looks stupid).

Anyway, there isn't much of a point to this blog, I just fancied writing one. Interestingly, I haven't been doing much this week, just spending the day time in school and spending the evenings sleeping. It's been somewhat of a dodgy week for my internet though, it hasn't really been working. Whenever this happens I get round to reading one of my many books I have stacked up from people buying them me at Christmas. I'm reading now "Heavier than Heaven" by Charles R. Cross. It's basically a biography on Kurt Cobain. I'm really enjoying it so far, I've read about half. I recommend it to anyone who - like me - likes reading about troubled people and people who lead mental lives. When you read a book like this though you usually find out their crazy antics are always exaggerated by the media, or in Kurt's case, by himself. The books go through the same pattern, well seem to. Troubled childhood - finds meaning - looses meaning - starts drugs - stops drugs - starts drugs - dies. This kind of scares me considering Pete Doherty has this cycle (Without the troubled childhood kind of), and he is yet to die. I don't want that now do I?

Only a short blog tonight, as I'm off down to the pub with a few worthy companions. I am still not old enough to drink, which is ridiculous considering it's my birthday on February 1st. (A few days away from the day I'm writing this). I guess it's just one of those things everyone goes through and I have to be patient, I'm still going to have a fair few tonight though, oh and maybe a nice pack of ready salted crisps. My favourite crisps are smoky bacon if you were wondering by the way. Enjoy your evenings and weekends guys!

P.S I promised this guy a mention the other day, but he probably has forgot and won't even realise I've done so, but here you go Jack Symes - Enjoy his blog people.